Patience Has Never Been One Of My Strong Points...

I've never really been a patient person before.

I make plans for a reason. So I know what's going to happen and when. So I can be properly prepared. I've tried to learn flexibility, and I have gotten better at it when it comes to situations that are not particularly important.

But this is a bit of a different story.

I've been unemployed for two and a half months at this point, and I'm starting to get anxious. Impatient, even. And that's frustrating. What's even more frustrating, however, is that through my impatience I'm demonstrating a lack of faith in God's perfect plan for my life. This entire situation is happening for a reason and I know it's for my good and for God's glory.

But it's so difficult to see in the midst of it. I know it to be true in my head, but I'm struggling to believe it to be true in my heart.

There are just so many things running through my mind, but mainly: What am I even doing with my life? I've worked so hard my entire life, and I feel like I have nothing to show for it.

For my GOOD and for His GLORY.

For MY good and for HIS glory.

For my good AND for His glory.

As always...

Let the adventure continue!

I Can't Believe Another Year is Over

New Year's Eve/Day has always been a therapeutic time for me.

It's a time for me to reflect over the last year and realize that ahead of me is a brand new year with new adventures, opportunities, and the chance to be better.

I feel, though, that each year I need a new start even more. It seems that each year becomes more difficult and complicated, and at the end of each year I can't wait to put it behind me and start over.

2012 included the realization that my job situation was not as it should be, which eventually was "taken care of".

My grandfather became extremely sick and was put in the hospital and wasn't expected to live. He is still kicking it today!

I moved in with a fantastic new roommate in April and we live in a lovely house!

I started co-parenting the most adorable Husky (ish) puppy you have ever met!

My mom was found to have pre-cancerous cells in her breast tissue.

I was in a relationship that taught me a lot, made me grow up and forced me to seriously evaluate myself as a person. No regrets there! Not to mention we had a blast and I got to experience so many new things! (camping, San Diego, etc.)

I was able to build relationships that have become irreplaceable and more important and influential than I could ever have imagine them to be with amazing, Godly women.

And through it all the Lord has been more than faithful and amazingly gracious and merciful with me.

But I am ready for a new start. New experiences. A New Year.

Let the adventure continue!

His Grace and Mercy Abound

At this point all I can do is laugh and thank the Lord for his grace and mercy in my life.

Due to... circumstances... my roommate is now also looking for a new job. She is also leaving a less than ideal situation, so for that I am excited. However, she is seriously looking outside of the Denver area, and is thinking about moving home. If nothing has resolved by February, the house will go up for sale. I'll be losing an awesome roommate, a great house, and the most precious dog you've ever seen.

AKA I will soon be homeless and jobless. 

Okay that sounds a little dramatic... but could potentially be true.

So what have I been doing with my time? Well that's the great part! I have had so many opportunities to help out other people, and I love it! I've driven to the airport 10 times to pick up/drop people off, babysat for a couple of different friends, cared for a friend who was in the hospital, helped plan a baby shower, started teaching myself how to cook and have started working on projects for the church. It has reminded me that there is more to life than a job. I spent all my time and energy on my job, and neglected what was really important: my relationship with the Lord and my relationship with others. I am working on fixing that now, but it is definitely a work in progress.

This Christmas break has been therapeutic. Being at home with my family, having someone else to take care of me (my mom, of course), and reconnecting with lots of "long lost friends" has been so refreshing and encouraging. 

When I get back to Denver it will be time to get the ball rolling. Honestly, a lot of elements in my life are uncertain, and it's mildly stressful, but He is faithful and will provide. 

More than ever...

Let the Adventure Continue!

Whelp...

This is definitely not a post I ever thought I would write.

As of two weeks ago I am no longer employed.

I know. I heard your gasp all the way from here.

I didn't talk about it much on here, but the work environment was quite hostile. Because of management issues, I wasn't able to trust my coworkers with anything. They had all turned on each other and begun to turn each other (and me) in for things we did "incorrectly" or "not to their standards". They thought that because we were all technically "equal" that this would cause them to be looked upon in a better light. It almost made you feel better if someone else was getting into trouble because that meant the spotlight was off of you. I did not participate in this, but was a victim of it. I went into work every day sick to my stomach worried about what I could possibly have done wrong or what I was going to get called into the office for. I loved scene responses, examining the bodies, dealing with law enforcement and families. I loved my job, but I hated going to work. It was not a healthy environment.

But I was never going to quit. I was never going to give up what I had worked more than 15 years for.

So God was gracious enough to take it away from me.

I'm sure it's not surprising that I had found my identity in my work. This is who I've been for as long as I can remember. It's even how other people identify me. I'm quite sure that the first thing most of you think about when you hear my name is my job. If you went up to someone who has met me and said "hey, do you know that Emily girl?" they may look at you confused. However if you clarified with "you know, the death investigator" they would probably instantly become less confused.

So the Lord is showing me that I have found my identity in the wrong place. First and foremost I am a daughter of the Most High God, and I had forgotten that this is the only thing that matters. He can take everything away from me in the matter of a single conversation, but He will always be mine. I will never be taken out of his hand, and he will ALWAYS be faithful, even when it seems like everything is falling apart. And it does feel that way, in a sense.

Now I am not telling you that I'm completely fine, I've learned my lesson, and I'm totally over it. That would be a lie. I know these things to be true in my head, but the conversion to believing them in my heart is definitely taking time. I still feel lost at times. I have no idea what to do with my life right now. I'm trying to take some time to rest and rejuvenate, but my Type A personality is making that difficult. I want to be in control and have a plan, but I'm not and I don't. But He is and He does.

I'm taking time off until after Christmas, which I'll be going home for. I'm continuing yoga, learning how to cook, and focusing on the relationships that suffered during my awful work schedule. Some days are better than others, but I'm excited for what the Lord has in store for me.

So more than ever:

Let the adventure continue!

Some of my favorite family pics...

The Season Isn't The Only Thing That's Changing...

It's only been a few months since my last update! Progress!

Speaking of progress...

Work has been improving? (Yes the question mark was intentional.) I don't think my coworkers dislike me quite as much anymore. I just don't fit in with them. Not that I particularly want to, but it makes for a difficult work environment, and makes it that much more difficult to minister to them.

Also, I have this sinking feeling that something big is coming (in reference to work). The four counties that surround the one I work in have had major catastrophes in the last couple of weeks. It's only a matter of time. *shudder* Praying that we'll be prepared.

Things with the "friend boy" didn't work out. I was upset at first. It didn't exactly go down the way I would have liked, but I'm at peace with it now. I have had time to think about it. It happened, I learned from it, and it's over. And that's okay. I wouldn't trade it for the world. It was a great relationship and I'll always have fond memories. And I'm a better person because of it.

I'm ready for November 7. The political stuff is driving me crazy. *End of rant*

Oh my gosh. I started doing yoga. Game changer. I practice three times a week at the studio in my neighborhood. It's pretty much amazing.

I joined a new city group at church. I am now the coordinator of the Cole City Group. It has been such a blessing that I never quite expected. Such great counsel and encouragement. And new friends :)

Pippin is getting so big! He's adorable.

Mumford and Sons was so amazing. Like, so amazing. And mom got to come with me! We had a blast with Melanie. And the new album is so good. Like, so good.

The Halloween Party was a success!

And fall is beautiful here! But it's almost over... :(

And we took family pictures last time we were home! Parky also took his senior pictures. He got a few in his firefighter uniform. Oh my goodness he is so grown up and I am so incredibly proud of him!

And my sister is so pretty. She's such a strong, confident person. I'm secretly jealous...

Well I think that's all for now. Follow me on instagram and twitter (emilyannloves). I'll try to update more frequently :)

PS The Lord is faithful always. Not only when things go your way, but especially when they don't.

Wow, I Suck At This...

Okay, so it's been 10.5 months since I last posted.

I know. I suck at this. But it started getting to the point where there was soooo much to write about, that it got overwhelming, so I just decided not to.

I'll try to sum up work this way: when I try to type the word "decided", my fingers automatically type the word "decedent" instead. 

Work has been crazy, stressful, exhausting, fascinating and full of growth. Lots of growth. 

Growth. Growth. Growth. And growth hurts. A lot, sometimes, but it's always for the best. 

And yes, there is a new "friend boy" in the picture, but for right now we're just getting to know each other better. But boy do we have a blast together. I'm a huge fan :) (Check out my facebook. You'll probably figure it out pretty quick...)

Oh my goodness gracious alive. The Summit Denver is absolutely amazing. So many great friends, such good counsel and such support. I couldn't do this without them. Every single one of them. 

I went to California for the first time for my birthday! Oh my gosh, I loved it so much. The weather was perfect. It's possible living in San Diego or Santa Monica could be in my future, but not the near future. 

I've been rafting, tent camping, four wheeler riding up and down a mountain, and hiking at 12,000 ft. Never thought I would, but I loved it!

And I got a new bicycle! She's an Electra, and her name is Carmen. Haha. 

Also, I moved into a house with Sarah! And we have a Husky puppy named Pippin! He's adorable.

And I went to see Foster the People with Melanie! Mumford and Sons is coming up next month!

Well, I think that's all I have for now. If you want more pictures, follow me on instagram: emilyannloves. I'm really going to try to update this more often. We'll see how that goes. Until next time...

Let the adventure continue!

I'm Sorry, And You Are?

I'm sorry, and you are?
Oh! My social life!
I hardly recognized you! So good to see you again. It's been far too long.

Yep you guessed it! I'm back on day shift. 6am-4pm. MTW and every other Sat. Sun. And yes, that does mean I have a four day weekend every other weekend. And that's this weekend. And yes, I'm stoked.

I absolutely LOVE day shift. Tons of people at the office, lots of paperwork, follow up with doctors and families, and plenty of cases. Wow that sounded like sarcasm. It really wasn't. I really do love all of those things. Still not sarcasm. Just take my word on that, okay?

It had been so nice to see live people again. I can hear you laughing, but seriously. I feel like a human being again, not a vampire. It's baffling how much difference a few hours can make.

Changing gears, I wish I could express to you how absolutely mind-blowing it is to think that I have found something as amazing as The Summit Denver. Obviously it was completely God's blessing, and it just amazes me every time I think about it. To the point of tears. They are my family. They keep me in line. They care for me when I can't care for myself. And they encourage me to protect and advance the mission. Not to mention they're all just super cool people.

I know you guys are waiting for me to post about my cases. I've had a couple of interesting ones, including a homicide. But it is definitely still an open case because we can't find the guy who did it. We know who he is, but that's about it. Let's just say I'm now besties with the Mexican Consulate and watching kids attack a pinata with a metal bat makes me cringe. And I know I promised a story about the case that really got to me, but because I'm aware of who reads my blog, you'll just have to ask me about it in person.

Okay, I think I'm going to close with my most recent favorite lyrics by one of my favorite bands:
"And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears,
And love will not break your heart but dismiss your fears."
-Mumford and Sons

Let the adventure continue!